Sunday, January 25, 2015

Growth


2015 has been interesting so far.

I have been able to close many doors to make room with the new doors to open up. For instance, Carter has moved into my neighborhood (after the assistance of myself) and has made it a point to "reconnect". The old me, perhaps, would hesitantly reply, "Sure" but the more reassured me said, "No thanks...You don't like church, and knowing that, this probably won't work." And the sad part is, I have prayed for his growth for the past couple of years. He's a devout atheist and has proclaimed in with such pride. I wish him the best of luck.

And then there is the dream school. The place that rejected me initially a couple of years ago. I was not surprised back then. It was February 2012 and I thought that once I finished my internship in the beautiful Berkeley, I would find myself in the suburbs in Michigan. Yet, I received a rejection letter at 2AM while walking down to 7-11 for a snack. I was upset, but a sigh of relief swept over me. I was actually glad that things didn't go that way. Actually, I don't think I knew I was glad. I just felt that things were changing into the unknown. 

The unknown turned into staying in that area. I was able to make connections and meet people along the way that would shape and mold me. People who hurt my feelings and people who built me up. Still, I moved forward in knowing that forcing myself in a square box when I'm not a square peg deemed uncomprehend-able in my mind. I was lost. Again, I was lost but I was finally found.

I remember the vision I had while walking up Junipero Ave after classes. I saw myself teaching a group of students physics. Besides finding out that I owed a couple thousands of dollars, for me to be in the career field to teach excited me. I didn't know how it would happen but thankfully, God had a plan set out before me.

Two years after that vision, I am here, in my bedroom, in a daze. The school that initially rejected me now wants me. That school represents a myriad set of individuals that have come in and out of my life. I reapplied knowing that was the only place I wanted. I went 100% in. Only place I applied to because I knew, if God wanted me to be a teacher, He would show out and have me in my dream school. I didn't have another school in my heart to go to. I only had this one in mind because of the close proximity to family. Indeed, the key idea for me here is my faith. My faith has grown from worrying about my future to, "Well, if God doesn't want this place for me, then He will set up the next steps. HE HAS BEEN FAITHFUL." No doubt, he has been faithful.

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